There are different opinions about avoidance and they seem to fall short when it comes to the reality of living a functional life with cPTSD. So we will take a short look at the extreme statements about avoidance and explore the body work concept of capacity to create more clarity. Avoidance Contra Some believe […]
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TRE for healing complex trauma?
TRE stands for Tension and Trauma Release Exercises. It is a new form of releasing stress through working with the body. To understand why and how TRE works we need to take a look at physiology and a polar bear. Theory In mammals we can find a natural response to extreme stress that keeps […]
Impulse and Control
Trauma usually comes with problems in self-regulation and self-control but people differ in the way it shows. Under-control (UC) like chronically unmanageable emotions or intense, often destructive, impulses are usually diagnosed as BPD, sometimes it shows in impulsive eating disorders like binge eating or bulimia. We think that under-control is addressed well in DBT, so […]
Chillaxing with Otters (guided imagery)
This is not your classic water imagery of a person having a bath in a lake. I personally struggle with that kind of imagery; doing it all dressed feels unnatural, getting undressed or changing clothes doesn’t feel safe at all. Imagining my body in clothes appropriate for bathing brings up emotions that are not helpful […]
Epiphany #7: War and Peace
Most of my therapy journey was based on scanning my body permanently, looking for early signs of dissociation, so I could choose the right tools to counter it. I was looking for reasons to act. It is stressful to live like that because it keeps up a certain degree of hypervigilance at all times. I […]
Dealing with body flashbacks
This article is triggering. I didn’t see a way to openly talk about this subject otherwise. I am limiting the most triggering information to a paragraph that I will mark with **** at the beginning and end and that can easily be skipped without effecting the comprehension of the rest of the text. Because we […]
Orientation and Grounding
When we get triggered our first response should not be an effort in self-soothing. That would be unnecessarily hard to accomplish as long as we are not oriented in time, space and body. Our nervous system is still reacting to the past. First we need to realize that we are safe in this situation, then […]
Becoming a safe church
In my heart I wanted to write an article about the small things the church could improve to make it easier for people with cPTSD to be there and feel safe. Things like a careful use of the ‘laying on of hands’ so people won’t get touched without giving consent. Or maybe preachers using a […]
Being a safe person in a relationship (for helpers and friends)
(If you came here and you missed the first part about being a safe person for beginners, please follow the link and read that first. It is the foundation for everything we do in a deeper relationship as well.) When you are not just someone who sometimes gets in contact with traumatized people but […]
Creating safe situations (polyvagal concepts for helpers)
Friends and helpers often ask how to create a safe situation for the survivors they care about. I have already started to give answers on how to be a safe person. We will continue from here. Some of this is science-based, some is information collected from other survivors, some is my own experience. We describe […]
Being a safe person for beginners (polyvagal concepts for helpers)
Friends and helpers often wonder how they can be a safe person for the people they care about. As survivors we often feel overwhelmed when we get asked how to support us because it is too much to say and to keep in mind for a simple answer. I will at least start to give […]
Balancing in Therapy
In nature, balance is never static. It is achieved by constantly re-adjusting and adapting to changing influences. It never stops, there is no time when a perfect balance exists for long. Balance is really a verb, not a noun. It is natural that all our therapy work is happening with ups and down, constantly shifting, […]
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